Generation Y’s Real Café 80s

Most people reading this will be familiar with the 50s retro diner, in concept if not by firsthand experience. This style of restaurant gained popularity in the 1980s as Baby Boomers neared middle age. Savvy restaurateurs figured out that appealing to that generation’s nostalgia for the 1950s culture they dismantled in the 1960s would print money.

It seems counterintuitive, but enough of the rebellious flower children had bought in, sold out, and amassed historic wealth to make exploiting their childhood memories sound business sense. In a way, diners festooned with stills of Ed Sullivan, bumpers from 57 Chevys, and “I Like Ike” posters is the capitalist analogue to the Leningrad museum keeping the world’s oldest copy of the Bible.

Perhaps due to the general solipsism of their parents’ generation, Gen Y grew up with the assurance that there would be 1980s-themed nostalgia restaurants when they grew up. Venerable time travel series sophomore entry Back to the Future Part II gave young Ys a vision of their childhood touchstones mapped to the 50s diner format.

Time passed, 2015 came and went, and Gen Y approached middle age like their Boomer parents before them.

And the long-prophesied nostalgia restaurants did come.

After a fashion.

Because instead of the Café 80s …

What we got was this:

You can be forgiven for mistaking the above image for a photo taken ca. 1990. At least at first glance. But as the LCD TV and light fixtures give away, it was taken last year.

In 2019, Pizza Hut brought back its 1974 logo, banking on its nostalgic appeal. I figured that would be the end of it, just a simple marketing tactic soon forgotten. There were no plans announced to bring back the logo in stores, much less redesign the restaurants to look like old Pizza Huts from the chain’s heyday.

But with no fanfare whatsoever, that’s exactly what’s been happening. Pizza Hut has been taking legacy stores and converting them into “Classics.” The formula includes:

1. The old logo is used in pole signage as well as at the top of the (usually but not always) red-roofed restaurant. The pole sign features the addition of the word “Classic.”

2. The interior features cozy red booths and old-school Pizza Hut lamps.

3. Stickers featuring the long-discarded character Pizza Hut Pete are found on the door.

4. Posters feature classic photos from Pizza Huts of yore.

5. A plaque displays a quote from Pizza Hut co-founder Dan Carney, explaining the concept as a celebration of the brand’s heritage.

So far, these stores appear to be limited to smaller markets, where these legacy stores have survived, the bones of the old buildings intact.

As a friend of mine pointed out, it wouldn’t be that hard for Pizza Hut franchisees to buy back the title loan places that used to be Pizza Huts.

Cool! you might be thinking. Boomers got campy facsimiles of postwar diners. But Generation Y are getting our original Pizza Huts back!

And we are, and it is cool.

Until you consider the reason behind the dichotomy.

Boomers used 1980s money and marketing to reinvent the dives ex-Army cooks ran out of train cars into trendy modernized experiences. 50s-themed diners were only possible because the US had made big strides in terms of wealth and consumer tech.

Back to the Future II‘s Café 80s is a vision of 1980s style capital growth extended into the 2010s and manifested as a retro-themed restaurant. And while we did get robot waiters …

They a) have no personality, b) suck in general, and c) are relegated to submarine lube-slinging soy slop troughs; not marginally creative local ventures.

Why hasn’t the twenty-first century economy and technology realized the original vision of a Café 80s?

In all likelihood, because they can’t.

As it turns out, the 1990s weren’t the end of history after all. They were the end of the future.

To their credit, some companies have started to figure out that progress is not straight line that extends forever into the future. They’ve also begun to realize when the culture took a wrong turn and understand that the only way to make progress is to go back.

All of which leads us to the conclusion that Pizza Hut Classic is Generation Y’s real Café 80s. It is a more fit-for-purpose and sophisticated dining experience than supposed cutting-edge innovation can deliver.

And to prove that cosmic irony has a sense of humor, the real-life version of BttF 2’s locally owned retro café is brought to you by a dystopic megacorp. While the movie’s portrayal of 1985, a year its 2015 restaurant idolized, is a dystopia misruled by corrupt greed heads.

What’s amazing is that the IRL megacorp exercised some restraint decorating their classic Pizza Huts.

The retro photos and BOOK IT! poster depart from the authentic décor, but you have to look twice to notice.

My working theory is that corporate couldn’t spare the monetary or creative expense of going full Café 80s.

Which turned out for the best, since a random late 80s Pizza Hut is a cozier and more civilized place than a Current Year attempt at a 1980s concept restaurant would be.

 

This month only, elite patrons get first access to the outline for my dark fantasy novel-in-progress The Burned Book.

Don’t miss your chance to influence the adventure. Become a Neopatron through Patreon or SubscribeStar now!